Mad #450 (John Ficarra) - Football Issue I Guess - February 2005

Rejected Mad Issue Names
1. Abuse Terry Bradshaw Issue
2. Geriatric Indiana Jones Issue
3. Orange Monroe Issue
4. All Color Except Caldwell (and a few other pages) Issue
5. Our President Is Stupid Issue
6. Spy vs. Spy Calendar Issue
7. Gay Simpsons Issue
8. Bash Kirstie Alley Issue

Mark Fredrickson drew the cover for the "47th Annual Super Bowl Issue" while John Caldwell ("Broadcast Highlights and Innovations"), Dave Croatto ("Steve Madden Football"), Desmond Devlin ("Viewing Guide to Super Bowl Halftime Counterprogramming") and Mike Snider ("Celebrity Cause-of-Death Betting Odds") tried to add some football funnies but let's face it - the other stuff is better.  The best article is "Suggested Titles for the Next Indiana Jones Movie" by Matthew Cohen and Hermann Mejia.  Oddly, the 71-year-old Harrison Ford was injured nine years later on a movie set while trying to make a comeback as Han Solo.  A close second is "Two and a Half Wits" by Arnie Kogen with some great drawings of the television characters by Tom Richmond.  Monroe finally got some color but where is the love for John Caldwell?  If Sergio Aragones can get red borders, why not Caldwell?  The worst part of this issue are the six wasted pages in the center for a spy calendar and too many pages celebrating Blinx-2.  And, did we need all of those jokes about Kirstie Alley's weight?  (See pages 9, 13 and 48).  [JAM 7/29/2014]

Color Pages: 48 of 60 pages (80%)
Humorous Content: 49 of 60 pages (82%)

The Agony of De-Feet - Steve Madden Football
Random Acts of Mindless - The Fundalini Pages  [Celebrity Cause-of-Death Betting Odds - Terrell Owens]
Smells Like Sheen Spirit - Two and a Half Wits
The Dissing Link - 6 Degrees of Separation Between Anyone and Anything Part VIII
Broadcast Boos - Viewing Guide to Super Bowl Halftime Counterprogramming
The Wizard of Odd - Duke Bissell's Tales of Undisputed Interest
Joke And Dater - Bonus Pull-Out Spy vs. Spy Calendar
The Offend Zone - Broadcast Highlights and Innovations to Watch for in Super Bowl XXXIX
Joke And Dagger - Spy vs. Spy
Serge-In General - A Mad Look at The Incredibles
May the Ford Be with You - Suggested Titlesnfor the Next Indiana Jones Movie
Helping Handler - A Series of Unfortunate Outtakes from Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events
Canine Innings - A Preview of the New Dog Baseball League  [fake department]
Angster's Paradise - Monroe and ... The Swap
Homersexuals - Which Simpsons Character Is Gay?
Address Code - Lines Cut from George W. Bush's 2005 Inauguration Speech
Trump Roast - Another Morning on Fifth Avenue

Fold-In - Motor Scooter