Cosmoparody (Gerald L. Taylor) - TSM Publishing Corp. - Fall 1984 - 96 pages

Was it really a good idea to have a women's magazine parody written mostly by men like Charlie Kadau (Mad), Joe Raoila (Mad) and Sean Kelly (National Lampoon)?  The result is another, typical, nasty TSM publication.  Joan Rivers (1933-2014) is on the cover of this one and she must have had a package deal with Taylor/Shain because the first three pages of content (?) are a giant ad for her book (The Life And Hard Times of Heidi Abromowitz).  There was also a full-page advertisement for the same on page 61.  Since real excerpts from a contemporary book are not normal for a wacky parody, I think there was some quid pro quo here.  The humor is not all terrible.  "What's New in Beauty" is a clever article with illustrations about the latest beauty aids including "Mascara in a Drum," "Swiss Beauty Knife" and "Cosmetic Surgery at Home".  And, "Since I Fell for You Under the Boardwalk"  is a full-page "fiction" article written entirely by using sappy pop song lyrics from the 1960s.  The magazine ends with a six-page romance "novel" about a female President of the United States.  But, most of the rest is just crude sexual jokes written by men for men.  [JAM 5/25/2017]

Front Cover - Joan Rivers
2  Index  [totally fake]
4  Step Into My Panties (editorial)
6  Ims Klutz's Agony Column
7  List of Contributors
8  Outrageous Opinion: Revenge, Sweet Revenge by Mimi Pond
12 Excerpt from The Life And Hard Times of Heidi Abromowitz by Joan Rivers
16 Telling It All (new products, fashion, celebrities)
19 Your Man's Gas by Brandy Winters
20 Saying It All (quiz)
25 Forever Horoscope by Barbara Birdbrain
27 How to Handle Your Money (drawings by Marcy Gold)
28 Broad Humor by James Sherman [cartoons unfunny on purpose]
30 Larry "Bud" Melman: Where the Man Ends, the Legend Begins (personality)
32 Dishonorable Discharge (drawings by Marcy Gold)
33 A Career in Dominance: Do YOU Have What it Takes to Make Grown Men Cry? by Phyllis Exeter (drawing by Marcy Gold)
34 How to Remove That Unwanted Hair
36 What's New in Beauty (drawings by Priscilla Fried)
39 The Shame Yourself Thin Diet Quiz
40 What's Your Marriageability Quotient? by Brandy Winters
41 Your Mother Was Right - Accidents Can Happen: Our Guide to Underwear You Could Be Caught Dead In! by David Kaestle (fashion)
50 The Love Bus (travel)
56 I Was a Gyno-Junkie as told to Mimi Pond (drawing by Howard Perlin)
58 Slip Him Some Tongue (food)
60 What Is Your Ideal Date? (quiz)
61 The Life And Times of Heidi Abromowitz (real ad)
62 Prom Miscuous (decorating)
65 Shed Those Unwanted Brains by Brandy Winters
66 The Cosmos Sex Survey
67 Single Bride by Mrs. Julie Dexter-Dexter
74 Facelift (beauty)
79 He Lies He Cheats He Steals: What You're Doing Wrong by Judith Jurgaitis
80 How to Seduce Your Rapist by Phyllis Exeter (drawing by Tom Newbury)
82 Disrobics (exercise)
86 One Woman's Very Special Relationship with 700 Men by Leslie Fuller
88 Since I Fell for You Under the Boardwalk by Leslie Fuller and Sean Kelly (fiction)
90 Executive Suite by Bebe Barbour (novel)
96 Next Month  [same as totally fake index]
Back Cover - Nissan (real ad)